Princess Sabrina Meets her Squatter Toilet

Princess Sabrina Meets her Squatter Toilet

My Very Own Squatter Toilet

Now that I figured out how to bathe, all I have to do is figure out how to pee in my eastern toilet.  I just can’t seem to get it right.  Before I left Thimphu, Reidi advised me to just squat down and do your thing, but I still don’t get it.  I don’t feel comfortable asking anyone to show me how to go to the bathroom, so I have been trying to figure it out on my own.  I have tried all these different ways of squatting: I’ve held onto the wall and a bucket next to me for extra support, I’ve squatted at different lengths from the hole, I’ve moved my feet further in and out, I’ve peed at different speeds, etc.  However, I always manage to get some urine on my shoes or pants.  I bought “special” bathroom slippers for this reason.  There was only one time that I squatted “perfectly” and when I was done I jumped up for joy in the name of being a pro squatter, but the next time I was back to trying to figure it all out again.  Every time I have to squat down to pee, I feel like I am experimenting or trying to master a new art form.  This is so disturbing because I imagine that no one is more aloof at this than me and I now wish that I were a boy.

The first day I got here my body refused to do anything for that squatter toilet and it held everything in for as long as it could in hopes that a Western toilet might magically appear.  Eventually, my digestive system gave in and pooping in it isn’t so bad unless I imagine you’re constipated and have to squat there for a long time.  Your legs and knees will get sore or fall asleep and you might fall over.  I pray that I never get diarrhea because I don’t know how it will all make it inside the hole since there is no bowl like Western toilets to capture it all and it will probably get on your shoes, legs, wall, and floor.  Ewe that is not going to be a pretty sight and I should ask some of the other teachers how their diarrhea situation went.  Ha-ha.  Also if you get sick and need to vomit, good luck!  I think that you will have better luck vomiting in a bag than trying to bend or lay over a squatter.  Oh my, this is quiet a blog.  I sincerely apologize to anyone who is fully disgusted with me for painting these nasty images in their head.  Just know that this so called princess is laughing…